You’re going to meet a lot of women. If you want to find the fun ones quickly follow these steps:

Tease her, bust on her, and generally act like you don’t care.

Make a comment about her and walk away.

Be Cocky and Funny when you’re with her, and don’t be boring.

Then, if she’s responding positively (laughing, hitting you, telling you that you’re a pain, etc.), then say “Hey, do you have email?” If she does, have her write it down, then say “Bye”.

It’s a quick push/pull that will get you another time to date her. This is not the intial pickup time, so don’t blow it.

The followup is easily found in the ebook:

When wondering how to get back an ex, we often forget that we are working from a position of strength. If you are trying to convince a new potential partner to notice you, you may have to try various different tricks to gain their attention. You don’t know them so you don’t know which buttons to press.

But when dealing with your ex, you know exactly what they like and don’t like.

You know which clothes they prefer you to wear, what scent or cologne, where they hang out and what they like doing in their spare time. You know her favorite flowers or what team he supports. You know this person intimately and you can use this knowledge to your advantage. OK, you also have the disadvantage of the fact that you have already broken up once but that is not the end of the world. We all make mistakes and thankfully most can be rectified.

So don’t despair, you have a lot of things going for you.

Millions of couples the world over break up and get back together again and so can you. You just need to know how to approach your ex-partner and convince them that you deserve another chance. Honest communication is the best policy. Don’t be tempted to play games, you are not a child and this is not the playground. Some people will tell you that you should try and make your ex jealous. But trying to hurt anyone doesn’t show any respect for that person’s feelings never mind those of the person you are using.

Unfortunately how to have a successful relationship is not a subject taught in school.

Some of us are lucky to have parents who are still together and have shown us by their example, what a happy partnership is. But all too often this is not enough. Go into any bookshop and you will see shelves of books on relationships. How to make them better, how to make them work, how to meet the right man or woman, how to keep them once you meet them etc. You think of any question you may have had about your relationship and there is a probably a book written to answer it.

But reading loads of books won’t turn you into a relationship expert overnight.

You need to read the right material. You need to know that other people have found these books useful and been successful in attracting their ex back into their lives.

You want a course that doesn’t promise the earth but will help you to resolve your differences with your ex and enable you to become a happy couple once again.

Sometimes these books will claim to make you totally irresistible to the other sex. But this isn’t what you want. There is only one person you are interested in getting back. So, it really is up to you. You can stay home and be miserable wondering how to get back an ex or you can be constructive and take positive steps and hopefully soon you will be back in the arms of your lover once more.

This topic and more is discussed in the Magic of Making Up ebook. Learn the right and wrong things to do to get your ex back here

You’re going to learn three big things in this article. Things so simple and obvious but until you know you will continue making the same mistakes and missing the same opportunities with women.

You’ve been there and failed, rushing out with your tail between your legs.

Wussy!

She’s only a girl. And once you know how to make her laugh you’ll never need to worry about being rejected, or not even having the balls enough to talk to her in the first place.

Trust me, I’ve all ready been there and I’ve already done that.

You’re going to learn three big things in this article. Something that every guy shares with his guy friends but no one ever acts on or they figure it’s too hard to do and they continue failing with women

• You’re going to learn how to talk to women.
• You’re going to learn how to get a girl’s phone number or email address and turn that into a date the next day.
• Most importantly you’re going to learn that you can be more of a man than you think you are.

The very first girl that I felt an instant attraction to was this red-headed beauty. I first saw her at a bus stop, we were waiting for the same bus. Even
though I was awestruck by her looks I did manage to find my tongue enough times to introduce myself (it was winter so I said to her “I’m glad to share my weather with you” or something like that. We didn’t chat much, the bus arrived and that was that. I didn’t know her but she was friends with some of my friends. Getting closer to her was easy.

We both ended up at the same party a couple of weeks after that first magic moment. Up to that point I was able to find out what her name was and that
she wasn’t dating anyone. Prime news.

The party was fun, I was early, she was late. I hung out with my friends, loser singles all of them (LOL), then decided, right then and there, that rejection just couldn’t happen, not that night. I approached her and sat beside her. The first thing I said was “I was hoping you’d show up”. Surprisingly enough saying the truth was a good move because she replied “I was hoping you’d be here too.”

We chatted and had a couple of dances, chatted some more. The first slow dance that we had together I whispered in her ear “I’d really like to kiss you”. The song ended and she took me by the hand into another room and kissed me. We kissed a lot the rest of the night. It was a good night.

What you and I learned: be direct, be honest, stay in the moment.

I wasn’t really a chick magnet in my teens and twenties. I had to work hard to create situations that allowed for introductions to be made to the women I liked. It goes without saying that until I changed this strategy I didn’t have many dates at all. I spent more time as a single guy getting drunk every weekend, and finishing the weekend still without even a phone number of a girl to call, than I did even meeting women all the rest of the week. What I learned from this was that:
1) I was a wussy, and
2) I had no real clue how to approach attractive women or what to say to them.

Once my game changed, and I used a set plan that I could use on almost any woman, in almost any place and situation, my confidence soared and so did my success with women. Now, I wasn’t a “serial dater” by any stretch of the imagination but I became popular and even though a lot of introductions led to dates, not all of them ended up in bed, but I did have a good network of female friends, and they gave me great references to their friends to date me.

Thank you ladies!

The change happened when I realized the overwhelming stupidity of my fellow man and could make a story up about them and get a laugh out of a girl, then ask for her phone number, get it, and call her to meet me somewhere the next afternoon to hang out.

Asking her to meet me for a coffee or an afternoon dessert gave me unpressured time to find out more about her, talk a little about myself and generally decide whether she’d be worth a second date or not. Most of the women were worth the second date, but not many made it to the third.

If you need some funny, true and fresh stories go to the Reuters news web site and read the “Oddly Enough” section. These short and strange stories are always great conversation fodder. And it’s even more fun when you say you say the girl’s name in the article or say this is what happened to a friend. If she doesn’t believe you, pull out your phone and look it up. So you’re mistaken about her name being in the article… you did gain a couple more precious minutes in her company. And while you have your phone out get her email.

What you and I both learned: Have some funny stories on hand, ones that can be slightly changed to tease her with and don’t be afraid to ask her for her name/number/email and call her the next afternoon to meet you soon for coffee, dessert (my favorite choice) and keep things easy going.

As I got older introducing myself to women became much easier (ask anyone, doing something a lot of times usually helps you get good at it). And I could make her laugh within the first few minutes which helps women put down their “Automatic Player Repeller” guard.

It is surprising but it is true. As you practice something it does get easier to do. And that if something is really something you want to do well, practice and learning need to be part of your plan. A man is defined not only by his family, friends and career. He is also defined by what he does in his personal life and how he manages his personal moments.

If you’re like I was a few years ago, you’ve got to pick up your personal game. And you’ve got to bring your personal practices into the other aspects of your life. Positive change is not changing the oil in your car, it’s changing the car and the driver inside.

You can only make the most of your moments when you can appreciate what they are and when they happen. Stop hiding in the shadows. Step away from that wall.

Learn to have the time of your life and some awesome personal improvements too.

Thursday’s Dating Tip

Eye Contact Signals

Eye contact is amazing. Most men can’t keep eye contact with a woman who’s looking right at them.

This “breaking eye contact” signals to a woman that you are NOT secure, confident, and SEXY. You must learn to keep eye contact until SHE breaks it. Next, don’t worry too much about the eye contact.

The guys I know who are best with women approach women that they’re interested in whether they’ve made eye contact or not. It doesn’t matter. Sure, if you DO make eye contact, and she holds it for a little longer than she should, it’s a “move forward” signal… but you have to get over the idea that you NEED eye contact first.

I’ve approached HUNDREDS of women that I DIDN’T make eye contact with… and gotten great results. And when you’re dealing with EXCEPTIONAL women who are VERY attractive, you’ll find that they don’t “look around” as much, because they’re trying to AVOID eye contact with too many men… as they know that this will trigger an endless line of men who are trying to get their attention.

Do what YOU want to do. It’s YOUR reality, remember?

Thursday’s Dating Tip

How To Call A Girl

When you call a girl up and ask “What are you doing?” or “What are you doing later?” or “What are you doing Tuesday night?” you’re basically giving away all of your own power, and setting yourself up.

When a woman hears these words, she instantly realizes that you’re going to ask her out, and that if she has something “better” to do, she should take it.

Much better to say “I’m going to go have dinner later, you should come along” or “I’m thinking of going to X for dinner. I’ll let you join me if you pay…” etc.

I know this is subtle, but it’s important to set up every conversation in a way that doesn’t give away your power and increases her interest in you.

***QUESTION***

David
I’ve read the first chapter of your book and already I’ve gotten results and a clearer vision of why I date and who I want to date. I’m leaving the “Nice Guy/Loser” behind and really getting what I want and giving women
what they want too, a cocky /funny man that they can’t rule with their whims.

Thanks,
E.

>MY COMMENTS: It’s really amazing to me that a lot of us guys use a strategy called “Be a nice guy” when we’re with a woman that we are attracted to…

But that this very strategy prevents us from EVER experiencing real success and mastery in this area!

What’s with that?

Like you said, you’re now GIVING WOMEN WHAT THEY WANT: A cocky, funny man that they can’t control. Enjoy the rest of the book.

Dear David:
I’ve had a lot of success dating on the Internet, but I would always respond with the typical, boring description and “hope to hear” sort of introduction, and let my picture do the selling, as I am a handsome guy. Well, last night I was browsing and I saw a BEAUTIFUL woman. I responded with the “let me guess, you get about 50 emails a day from geeks” email. Well, her response back started out with “How did you get my password, because you must have been reading my emails”, and ended with “so what do you do when you’re not writing charming emails?”. I included my photo, but I think I’m in here.

Thanks,
J.

>MY COMMENTS: Isn’t that GREAT?!
I love to hear stories like this one…

By the way, you would absolutely not believe that volume of email that comes in to me saying “Hey, I lost the newsletter with the personal ad response in it… can you send it to me again?” and “Everyone is talking about how well the personal ad letter you wrote works… can you send it to me?” and such.

If only I had the time to sit at my computer day and night answer all of the requests…

In any event, make sure you get her on the phone ASAP, and don’t dilly-dally. Strike while the iron is hot.

***QUESTION***

“When I ask for the phone number, women often ask “what do you need it for?” Does it mean that they are not interested or I didn’t do the talking well before or they just challenger me? If it’s a challenge, what would be a good response?
Thanks in advance,
S.

>MY COMMENTS: To me this smells like you’re giving off some strange vibes. It’s only a guess (and an educated one), but if women are asking you “What do you need it for?” often, then you’re probably coming off a little strange.

Work on your confident, cocky/funny demeanor. That should help. You must ask in a way that doesn’t say “I’m a wuss and I don’t think you’re going to give it to me”.

By the way, WHAT ARE YOU DOING STARTING OFF WITH ASKING FOR NUMBERS?

Haven’t I ranted and raved enough about how much easier it is to get email addresses, and how much better women reply to emails than calls?

Don’t make me yell at you again in public!

***FROM A WOMAN***

“I am a nineteen year old woman who searched the internet with my now-broken up boyfriend and found your newsletter and jokingly signed up for it under my screen name. Well, I have been reading it and I must say…your advice to these men is very accurate…how did YOU ever get to know all this stuff? You say that you get a lot of women writing in that it’s not fair that you tell men these things. I personally am glad that you do, I’ve searched the world over for a man who will act like that…but WOMEN want advice TOO!! The game would be a little more fair if women had the same cheat sheet that you’re giving the men. So, that being said…I have the “innocent” sort of look, and as a result many of the men I run into tend to treat me like a child. How do I get them to see me as a woman and not as their little sister?”

>MY COMMENTS: Did I ever mention that I respect 19 year old innocent-looking women highly?

To answer your question, I got to know all this stuff because I woke up one day and I was SICK AND TIRED of not knowing the first thing about how to approach women, get their number, make them feel attracted to me, etc. And I hated it.

So I spent a long time reading, learning, and getting to know guys who knew how to attract women. I looked for the common elements, and I refined those (and developed several of my own in the process).

By the way, if you want to learn the female version of how to be attractive, read the book “The Rules.” I even recommend that guys read it. Fun stuff.

So back to your problem of being an innocent-looking 19 year old woman who wants more respect…

Stay tuned to these emails, and use what you learn.

Oh, and call me for some private consulting. Your situation sounds challenging, but I think I may be able to help.

***QUESTION***

Dave,
I won’t bore you with more exclamations of how you are the man or how your techniques are the best thing since french ticklers, so let me get right to the success story and a follow up question. Met a sweet young thing at the university I attend. Went from never having spoken to her at all last semester to having her come sit by me this semester every day because I make her laugh. Sprinkle in lots of “smileys” and “winkey” faces in e-mail, never mentioning her boyfriend, etc. and you see where I’m going. The 19-year old Italian ballet dancer is making pasta for me at her place later this week, and I can’t wait to see what she has in mind for dessert.

The question is not mentioned in your e-mails or in your book (which I did download and which does rock the house). What is, in your experience, the best way to deal with “cock-blockers”. These are the guys that while you are talking to a girl, even just during the brief one or two minutes, have to jump it at annoyingly high volume with their favorite anecdotal contribution to your humor. It wrecks not only the rhythm but the attention of the target. Obviously bashing him/her isn’t the plan as we’re not here to get into confrontations. What methods have you found to best deal with this? Let’s assume this is a girl you really want to home in on, so at least until you find out if she is available, “moving on to the next one” isn’t the first option.

I’d also like to mention that while you stress the importance of not using these techniques at work, I would like to stress that a workplace environment is an exceptional place to practice! Avoid any of the sexual innuendo but be cocky and funny. Find out what works and what doesn’t. Find out what girls in the age group are looking for that month. And so on. Even if you don’t ever get with any of them, they are great “sharpening stones”.
Be cool, D.

>MY COMMENTS: This is a great question, because it actually happens often.

As far as I’m concerned, you have to just be a Jedi.

Your only purpose is to get her email address and phone number.

Don’t worry about anything else.

If someone starts being stupid and distracting, just cut it short, and say “It was nice talking to you, I’m going to get back to my friends and leave you two to chat….

…Hey, do you have email?”

Then just get her email and number right in front of your admiring blocker, and walk away. Take it as a signal that it’s time to get the info and hit the road.

***QUESTION***

Lots of respect Dave,
I have and issue, no matter where i am and i see a girl that i like, i am some how afraid to go over and talk to her. If you could let me know what to do to get rid of this fear as soon as possible.
Thanks.

>MY COMMENTS: It takes a lot of nerve to admit that you’re afraid in these situations. You’re not alone.

Here’s the deal:
Every one of us is different.

I know you want a quick solution, but a quick solution depends more on you than it does on anything else.

I recommend that you start by chatting with women on AOL and other instant messaging services. This is great free practice, and it allows you to think, because IMs are slow.

Next, work your way up to conversations with waitresses, checkers, bar tenders, hostesses, and other women who are being paid to be nice to you.

Then, try doing something that involves a lot of people with a common interest… like yoga, pottery, or sports. These situations have a lot of built in opportunities to talk to women you don’t know.

Finally, start talking to women that you see everywhere.

Of course, it’s very important to know what to say, and how to talk to them. For a full explanation of the mindset and attitude, refer to my book “Double Your Dating.”

It’s up to you how fast you progress. Remember, they don’t bite… (well, most of them don’t).

***COMMENT***

David i liked your email about “Are you a player” One response that I really liked and that has worked for me is a play on words, no pun intended. I’ve been asked if I a player not if I date other women. So I have used the responses:

“Yeah, (pause) I play/played hockey, I play basketball. . .”

Or if I have already had sex with her or fooled around with her:

“Well i like playing playing with you” (then give her a little pat on on the butt or touch her somewhere else)

Its been my experience, you may or not agree, that women find this a play on words is not only funny, as long as you don’t sound like a dumbass, but imaginative all the while making you more attractive to them.

>MY COMMENTS: Ah, someone who gets it.

***QUESTION***

David,
What kind of style or clothing do you recommend to attract women? Dark colors? Solids? Collared shirts? What kind of pants? Shoes? Accessories like watches etc?

And still try not to spend a fortune! And just curious, does a man in uniform have any advantages and if so, what uniform is the best?
Thanks
B.

>MY COMMENTS: I recommend that you check out how Motley Crue dresses, and try to copy them as much as you can. They seem to get a lot of girls, so try that.

WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE, YOUR FASHION CONSULTANT? lol…

This is actually a great question for your FEMALE FRIENDS.

If there’s one thing you can usually count on getting from your women friends, it’s good fashion advice. And they often know the great discount places to shop as well.

My take on fashion is that you don’t have to wear expensive clothes or fancy watches, but it sure helps if you know what you’re doing and you have at least a little bit of style.

Start reading GQ when you’re at the newsstand… watch how the handsome lead guys are dressing in the movies… stay tuned to what kinds of jeans are in, what kinds of colors are in, and what kinds of shoes are in. It really doesn’t take very much time at all.

Then go down to your local discount clothing store like Ross Dress For Less, Marshalls, or my favorite, The Nordstrom Rack, and mix-and-match up some hip getups for your bad self.

A lot of the guys I know who are very successful women are neither rich, tall, or handsome…

…but almost all of them dress well.

And dressing well doesn’t mean spending a lot of money, it means knowing HOW. Someone who knows HOW can walk into a Goodwill or used clothing store, and walk out looking great having spent twenty bucks.

And remember, women ALWAYS know whether you know or not.

***QUESTION***

Hi David,
I’ve known this girl I grew up with since we were little, but the only problem is that I don’t know how I should go about telling her that I’m interested in her, every time that we are out with some friends of our every thing is all right, but when its just me and her in the car its quiet not much to say to one another and that if its the right thing to do to ask her if there could be something between her and I since we are so close what should I do.

Thanks…”

>MY COMMENTS: SSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPP!

Whoa, Trigger.
The first thing you need to do is NOT “go about telling her that you’re interested in her.”

And the second thing you need to do is NOT “ask her if there could be something between her and I”.

NO NO NO NO NO.

But first, let’s address the “every time we go out and it’s just her and me in the car it’s quiet” thing.

The reason that it’s quiet is because YOU LIKE HER, SHE KNOWS THAT YOU DO, YOU CAN’T THINK OF ANYTHING TO SAY TO HER, AND YOU JUST ACT LIKE A WUSS… WHICH ONLY MAKES THINGS WORSE.

I’d be quiet if I were in a car with you myself (but, unlike her, I think you’re pretty cute).

Try this:
Do yourself a huge favor, and date a few other women for awhile.
Don’t call her for a week or two.
Then, when you do talk to her or see her again, just be friends with her.
Tell her about what you’re up to, that you’re dating some other women, and that you have to go… then hang up.

You need to get some other options in your life, and you need to quit being quiet and creating that uncomfortable silence which says “I’m attracted to you, I’m insecure about it, and I’m sure hoping that you like me back.” Don’t do that anymore.

Women aren’t attracted to weakness and insecurity. And one of the best ways to communicate that you’re weak and insecure is to ASK
her if she likes you, or tell her you like her.
And read my book “Double Your Dating.” You’ll learn a lot.

***QUESTION***

Dave,
I have a question. A few months back I started dating this fantastic woman. We hit it off instantly. I have been practicing the cockiness before with great success. She loved it and things went along great. The mixture of romance and cockiness worked very well but stopped working. The problem is that she has suddenly decided she does not want a boyfriend right now because she has many things to work out. I have given her space, and she will email me or call after a few days to see what I’m up to, but no indication of when or if we will go out again. Do I give up, keep at what I’m presently doing, or just move on? Thanks
T. in Dallas

>MY COMMENTS: This is only a guess because I don’t know all of the details, but my guess is that you DIDN’T GIVE HER ENOUGH SPACE.

You probably called her too much, saw her too much, and acted like a clingy-boy.

When a woman says any of the following:

“I don’t want a relationship right now”

“I really care about our friendship and don’t want to mess that up”

“I like you as a friend”

“I need some time to find myself”

…it usually can be translated thusly:

“You were cool at the beginning, but you started acting like a wuss, and I just don’t FEEL IT for you.”

Solution: Don’t call often. End conversations first. Give her space. Always end interactions too soon, and on a high note…

Get it?

Don’t take it personally, take responsibility.

And remember, ATTRACTION ISN’T LOGICAL. Women aren’t attracted to what they SHOULD be attracted to.

If you want women to feel attraction, you’re going to have to learn how to create it.

Stay tuned.

***QUESTION***

Hi David,
Your newsletter is really good. I come from Scotland and although I can detect a slight ‘American’ influence it really works well. I have a problem David that I just don’t know will ever be solved but I’d like to ask you anyway. I realise it is a bit heavy but the main thing is I’m sort of OK with it. I have a disability David that I think puts women off from the ‘this is my man, an he’ll provide for me, attitude’ Talking to women as never been much of a problem (I think I’m OK at communication). ; even hooking up sometimes and more often than not the ‘back to my place thing’.

I’ve also been involved with a women for four years and although the sex is great, deep down we both know we aren’t going anywhere. It gets worse because she is a good friend now and a companion. She also helps me clean the house up and has one of my keys. I just don’t know what to do David. I don’t expect you to reply to this e-mail but if you do, thanks for all the tips. For all the other guys out there – listen to this man – he knows what he’s talking about.

Cheers,
A.

>MY COMMENTS: I hope you see the irony in your email to me…

I get emails all the time that say:

“Oh, David… please help me… I’m a good-looking, athletic guy, but I just can’t figure out what to do with the ladies…” and such.

And you’re emailing me saying that you have all kinds of success with women, and you’re just ending a four-year relationship… and you want to know what I think about your situation.

Here’s the deal: Sure, some women might have an initial issue with your disability. We all have aspects of our lives that aren’t the “ideal” socially approved variety.

But you will only be as limited as you allow yourself to be.

I know and know of guys that have overcome so many incredible challenges and gone on to be successful in all areas of life, that I can only say “You can make whatever you want to make of your own life and success.” And this includes success with women. You’re already way ahead of most guys…

***QUESTION***

David,
I am a 39 year old guy and am still single because of a lot of personal problems I went thru in the early and mid 1990s (nothing too serious–wasn’t arrested, didn’t go bankrupt, wasn’t psycho, etc). Now that all of this is in the past, I’ve been venturing out into the dating scene again. As I’m more serious about finding a relationship, I prefer women in their 30s and early 40s. My question is this: Do you think that the “cocky and funny” routine works on women in their 30s and 40s too? It seems to me that women of this age group who are divorced/single do not want to play games as much. I’m not looking to play games either.

Or should I take a modified approach to cocky/funny?
Thanks,
Dating in Chicago

>MY COMMENTS: You’re using the word “games” here to describe the cocky/funny attitude, and I think that we’re mixing up our definitions and associations.

When I think of “games” as the term relates to men, women, and dating, I think of things like lying, cheating, and manipulation (in the negative sense).

Cocky and funny is a fun, attractive attitude that is VERY attractive in general – to women of all ages.

And yes, women that are in their 30s and early 40s love it.

***QUESTION***

Bonjour David,
I’m 31 and i teach computer office stuff. Most of my students are woman from 22 to 50. I’ve always been the guy that is …I wouldn’t not say an AFC, but in french we say “homme rose”. So, i’ve been reading your mail for a while and after i finally got the courage to change my personality, I started acting cocky and funny (and why not practice on my classes). Would you believe it, in an instant my classes became a chicken farm…and i’m the only rooster…ahahah!(picture me in front of 20 women that really enjoy looking at me and listening to me!!!). I’m not talking about flirting here. Their attitude toward me changed dramatically, some of them kiss me when they get into class, they touch me a lot now, they try to match me with the hottest in the class, it’s very funny. I have a girlfriend that i truly love for more than a year now, but realizing that i can attract a lot of woman gave me confidence toward what i can bring to my girlfriend. That way i know that if our relationship ends one days (i don’t want that but…) i can just turn around and have other options…

What is strange about this new situation, now they pass the word around that im a bad boy ( i guess to them it’s a way of saying attractive man, different from others). To all of you readers. The more you will act cocky/funny, the more this will become your nature, blended with your own personal style.

In the history book of seduction. Your name is in it David.
S.

>MY COMMENTS: Tomorrow I’m going to call up and find out what I need to do in order to teach computer skills to groups of women.

***QUESTION***

Dave,
Your stuff is right on. The thing I like most about it is that you keep your self-respect when use the stuff in your book . . . and women pick up on this.

My question is this: Can you recommend any exercises that one can do on his own that can keep him from behaving like 95% of the losers that have no spine and no persistence? You know… some “spine strengthening” exercises.

Keep up the good work,
S.

>MY COMMENTS: The best exercise is to make sure to practice with EVERY woman you meet. From the grocery store line to the operator on the telephone. All of them.

Test every kind of cocky/funny idea you can come up with.

If you’re on the phone with the operator, say:

“Wow, thanks for your help… I think this relationship is off to a good start.”

If you’re in a clothing store and a woman asks “Can I help you?” say “Wow, this new cologne must be working… I’ve had a woman walk up and talk to me in every store I’ve been in.”

Just practice saying charming, funny, slightly arrogant things.

If you keep this up, you’ll keep seeing the positive responses that you’ll get, and it will become “reflexive.”

***INTERESTING STORY AND QUESTION***

David,
I have had a lot more success with women since I got your e-book. The techniques do work, however I realize that I have a ways to go before I really get rid of my bad habits in dealing with women and get to be good with your material.

Background and Question: I met this girl a year ago, we hit it off real well for quite a while, but then she went cold on me (you don’t have to say it:) I know, I started really liking her, and started to make all the wussy mistakes that most unenlightened guys make–the biggest mistake was that one night she was rather inebriated and obviously wanted sex, but I did not make any advances on her in that state; that was when she really lost interest in me.

So I got pissed at her for the way she was acting after that (ignoring me completely, not doing things with me she had committed to etc.), and didn’t contact her anymore (as a side note, I had not yet found your newsletter or ezine at the time, nor had I decided that I had to really get this aspect of my life dealt with–after she started acting uninterested, I decided that I must fix this part of my life–so I bought your ebook).

Let me explain that I am a very inexperienced guy when it comes to women (I am very young and still a virgin)–so I have some major stumbling blocks like getting up the courage to kiss her, to know HOW to transition it to the next level etc.

So after a couple of months, she called me and was all friendly like nothing ever happened. She told me she was seeing another guy, so I wished her the best and ended the call first–but I know she was curious at least about me (of course—she was not used to getting the cold shoulder from me).

It went on like this for several months (on friendly but very aloof terms for my part–I always had to go, ended the call first etc) til recently; she called me last week and invited me out with her to see some Flamenco dancing. I was noncommittal and said I would get back with her the next day to confirm or not. I was supposed to call her back the next day, but decided to make her call me so I wouldn’t look too interested. Sure enough she called me that afternoon and I accepted. She insisted that she pay for the tickets and treat me out (I told her that I was broke on the phone), and so we went.

On the way there she started to tell me that she was single again (hint) and that she was upset that she was shot down by a guy recently. Halfway through the performance, there was a break when we could talk and she bought us drinks, started to complain how she had never been asked for marriage (for crying out loud, she’s barely 20, and she is certainly cute with a great figure). She is also convinced that I have girls all over me–she kept bringing the subject, and Dave, I must say that I very skillfully didn’t answer her direct questions, but made it into cocky funny jokes. She still wonders…

I teased her about this for a bit and was cocky and funny the whole time. On the way home she wanted a light from me and I told her “for a kiss” in a funny way to which she said that she would find her own lighter and wasn’t a good kisser; I told her she needed to be taught by a good teacher, and that I would have to just steal that kiss and teach her (however I didn’t–no good opportunity arose as she was driving a difficult road and there was a console between us–should I have just kissed her anyway when I wanted to kiss her?).

Then we got home and she told me again that she was real tired and not feeling well (which she had been saying all evening, in fact even on the phone that day, and I think it was the truth) and I left after thanking her and kissing her on the cheek (there were no cues for me to make any moves so I didn’t).

OK– sorry for all the background but it is necessary. Now the questions: Is she interested in me again as I think? Did I handle it alright for a novice? What cues do I need to put my arm around her and cuddle, etc., or do I need any cue from her to do these things? She is not a touchy feely person.

And finally, how should I handle it from now on? This is most important. There is a dance this Saturday, should I ask her out or stay aloof?

Thanks my friend,
C.

>MY COMMENTS: Your email made an impact on me… because it covers a lot of different real-world issues that us guys have to face all the time with women.

Sometimes a woman will be flirting with you, then the next time she’s cold as a fish.

Sometimes it will seem like she likes you, then it won’t.

Often, if you stop calling a woman who didn’t seem interested, she’ll start calling you.

Here are a few things to remember:

1) Women are attracted to men for very different reasons (in general) than men are attracted to women for.

2) Women are, in my experience, far more “fickle”. In other words, one day they’ll seem interested, the next day they won’t.

3) If a woman knows that you’re completely taken with her at the very beginning, she’ll be FAR less likely to be taken with YOU.

You’re doing just fine.

One of the most important things you can possibly do right now is to REMEMBER NOT TO TAKE ANY OF THIS PERSONALLY… AND NOT LET ANY OF IT DRIVE YOU CRAZY.

If you stick with it, keep learning, and keep practicing, you will start to get a “feel” for what’s going on with women.

And soon, you’ll be sitting back, thinking to yourself:

“Well, let’s see… I’ll bet that when this girl meets guys they fall for her quickly. Guys probably call her all the time. I’m going to call her, get off the phone quickly, give her some space, and if she doesn’t call me within a week or so I’ll give her another short call.”

And you’ll know which situations to do this in and why this is the right thing to do.
…and to anyone reading this right now start this great change by clicking here.

Let me ask you a question: What is “SUCCESS” to you when it comes to women?

Double Your Dating ebook

If I asked you to give me a detailed explanation of EXACTLY how your life would be if you had ULTIMATE SUCCESS with women, could you do it?
Sure, most guys would say something like “Success to me would be being able to walk up to any woman and get a date with her”… or “Success to me would be dating as many women as I wanted”… or “Success to me would be having a really sexy girlfriend”, etc.

These are the kinds of answers I hear when I ask guys this question.

But there’s a PROBLEM with these answers. NONE OF THEM REALLY MEAN ANYTHING.

If you learn how to approach any woman and get a date, you’ll soon find that you don’t know what to DO once you’re actually out ON the dates… how to take things to a physical level, how to kiss her, etc…

If you start dating several women at a time, you’ll quickly realize that it’s a MAJOR challenge to juggle all of those relationships and maintain a happy life…
If you find a really sexy girlfriend, there’s a good chance that she’ll have a whole bunch of personal issues and problems that you never anticipated.

You have to be careful what you wish for in life, because you’ll often get it. I’ve found that guys usually make TWO major mistakes then it comes to SUCCESS with women:
1) Most guys haven’t really thought through what success means to them in detail.
2) Most guys base their personal idea of success on what OTHERS want, and not what THEY want for themselves.

In fact, I was one of the guys that made BOTH of these mistakes. I can remember when I first decided to ONCE AND FOR ALL learn how to be “successful” with women. I had this idea in my mind that if I could just learn how to get women’s phone numbers quickly and easily that I would be successful beyond my wildest dreams.

So I went to work on figuring it out. I probably spent a good six or twelve months trying all kinds of different tricks to get women’s phone numbers quickly. And I figured out some great techniques.

I can literally get a woman’s number within a few minutes of meeting her. But once I learned this skill, I was hit with a MAJOR realization: Most of the women I was meeting never turned into DATES. They either didn’t return my calls, refused my requests, or just plain flaked out on me.

It was VERY frustrating.

The other problem I had was looking around at what OTHER guys were doing and saying “I want to be able to do what HE does…” or “I want to date the kinds of women HE dates”. And I secretly had this idea that if I knew how to date HOT women that all my friends would like me more and think I was a really cool guy.

Well guess what?

First of all, just because another guy is doing something doesn’t mean that it would make ME happy. In fact, I realized that in many cases it wasn’t even making HIM happy. I couldn’t help comparing my success and the women I was dating with other guys, and the women they were dating.

But it was a trap.

The more a person looks at what OTHERS are doing and focusing on that, the less satisfied they are with what THEY are doing themselves. And as far as other guys thinking I was “cool” because I was dating attractive women… WRONG AGAIN. Guys (even friends) usually envy you and resent the fact that you have success and they don’t. Especially when it comes to really attractive women.

So much for those losing strategies.

SO WHAT’S THE ANSWER?

Well, it’s taken me a few years to really put all the puzzle pieces together and figure out how to resolve these issues.

Here’s what I’ve come up with:
1) REALLY THINK ABOUT WHAT SUCCESS MEANS TO YOU IN DETAIL, AND WRITE IT DOWN.

Take the time (even if it takes days or weeks… or longer) and think through what you want for yourself. Do a little “self examination” (no, not down there), and be honest with yourself. See if you can figure out where your idea of what “success” is came from. Did it come from watching movies? Did it come from guys you know? Where did you get your model of what “success with women” is?

Once you’ve figured out where some of your ideas came from, then think about what you want.

Think about your life and your lifestyle.

Instead of looking at Playboy and thinking to yourself “I’d sure like to have seven blonde girlfriends in my bed”, try thinking about what would make you HAPPY on an ongoing basis. Take some time to write down the things you like in a woman. Write down what you DON’T like. Get a clear picture in your mind of how you’d like your life to be, and what kind of success with women would make your life more enjoyable.

After researching this topic for a few years now, I’ve come to the opinion that most guys (80%-90%) actually want to have a great long-term relationship with a fantastic woman.
Sure, some guys want to date around and sleep with a lot of women, but the majority of guys would really like to meet an exceptional woman and share a great connection… long term.

But guess what?
You’re not going to walk outside after you’re finished reading this and find that particular woman waiting on the corner for you.

In fact, you’re probably not going to meet her anytime soon.
If you want to find a REALLY exceptional woman that is beautiful, intelligent, funny, emotionally stable, financially independent, loving, etc. then you’re probably going to have to date QUITE A FEW women in order to FIND her.

And when you DO find her, you can bet your ass that she’s IN DEMAND. She probably has MANY guys who are interested in her on an ongoing basis, and she KNOWS that she has options.

TRANSLATION: You’d better have your sh** together when you do meet her, and you’d better not be acting like an idiot.
So think through what success means, what you want, what you don’t want, and how you’d like your life to look ideally when it comes to women and dating.

2) LEARN THE RARE SKILL OF MAKING WOMEN FEEL THE MAGICAL EMOTION CALLED ATTRACTION.

I have spent a long time now searching for the secrets of how ATTRACTION works. You’d probably guess that something as IMPORTANT and as POWERFUL as ATTRACTION would be well-researched and widely written about.

Well guess what?
I can’t find even ONE good book, audio tape series, seminar or website that describes it.

NOT EVEN ONE.

I’ve read all kinds of “opinions” on attraction, but when I really compare what I read and hear to my own personal knowledge and experience, I always shake my head and say to myself “No, that’s not right”. And by the way, if you’ve found a book, tape, seminar, or website, etc. that lays it all out, let me know. I think I’ve reviewed just about everything out there and met a lot of the experts on the topic… but maybe I’ve missed something.

The point is that I think that success in this area of life basically ALL comes down to understanding ATTRACTION. I’m not talking about being “physically attractive”, I’m talking about the EMOTION of ATTRACTION. If a woman feels ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else matters.

His looks don’t matter, his income doesn’t matter, his age doesn’t matter… nothing matters. On the other hand, if a woman DOESN’T feel ATTRACTION for a man, then nothing else matters!
His looks, income, age, etc. just don’t matter. Nothing he can do can make her feel that emotion.

Sure, a woman can “fall for” a guy over time. But in these rare cases it’s not because of ATTRACTION. It’s because she starts to feel an AFFECTION for him, and settles for a long-term relationship. Incidentally, this usually involves a man who pursues a woman, buys her gifts and dinners, behaves in a way that puts her value above his, etc. And, incidentally, it usually involves a woman who feels like she’s SETTLING.
BUT, if you know how to make a woman feel that amazing and unique emotion called ATTRACTION, then you will be in control of your dating success… and YOU can decide on and control what happens to you.

A man who has his life together and actually understands how to make a woman feel ATTRACTION is FAR more rare than a beautiful woman.
Think about that.

An exceptional man who understands ATTRACTION is FAR more rare, valuable, and desirable than even the most BEAUTIFUL woman.

If you don’t believe me, then ASK some beautiful women how many men like this they’ve known in their lifetimes. They’ll count them all on one hand. You’ll see.

And the best part, in my personal opinion, is that it doesn’t take any unusual talents, physical attributes, or large sums of money to learn these skills.

All it takes is an understanding of how ATTRACTION works, a desire to learn it, and the discipline to learn, practice, and improve over time.

What’s a good way to get started?

Well, you’re doing it. I think that reading these articles is one of the best ways to get a handle on how to make women feel ATTRACTION. What’s an even BETTER way?

I’ve taken knowledge from various fields… from brain research and psychology to animal behavior and mating patterns… and combined it with my real-world personal experience of figuring out what works.
There’s no fluff, and no B.S.

Double Your Dating ebook

One of the most common things I hear about this program is “This material has completely changed the way I think about women”.
I certainly wish that I would have had this program about five years ago… when I started out.
It would have saved me about THREE years, and probably thousands of hours of wasted time.
…and if you haven’t downloaded your copy of my online eBook “Double Your Dating” yet, then you need to do that NOW. It’s jam packed with concepts, techniques, and specific step-by-step strategies for meeting and dating women. It’s the foundation for all the other things I teach, and it’s fast and easy to download and read. Download it here. [This book and the three bonuses that come with it are the FOUNDATION for success with women. Everything you read in these articles will make more sense once you have read the book]

There are really two very different (and important) aspects to the “conversations with women” topic:
1. The HOW.
2. The WHAT.

THE HOW

Most guys want to know “what to talk about” with women.

It only makes sense that you should talk about things that women are interested in… right?
Well… partially.

It is actually FAR MORE IMPORTANT to talk about whatever topic you’re talking about in the RIGHT WAY.

In other words, if you don’t understand HOW to carry on a conversation that creates ATTRACTION, then it really won’t matter WHAT you talk about… because the woman you’re talking to won’t FEEL anything towards you.

The HOW of conversation includes (but is not limited to):
-Your body language
-Eye contact
-The Cocky & Funny style of communicating
-Flirting
-Sending mixed messages
-Directing the conversation
-Dealing with common questions and topics
…and many other things.

My point is that if you’re running into a lot of “uncomfortable silences”, nervousness, and other usual challenges, then you probably need to get the HOW handled before the WHAT.

THE WHAT

With that said, there are several topics that are GREAT to discuss with women. But instead of just giving them to you, I want you to do yourself a favor and THINK for a minute.

What topics do women PAY to hear about?
Hint: Cosmo magazine, romance novels, soap operas, nighttime dramas, the fashion channel… etc. If you think about it, the answer to this question is rather obvious.

For whatever reason, WOMEN tend to LOVE:
-Drama
-Conflict
-Romance
-Famous people and their lives
So… it’s really quite easy to enjoy a conversation with a woman about these topics.

Here are a few ideas:
1. Play amateur psychologist to the stars.
Talk about how someone famous is doing something really stupid, then psycho-analyze them.
For instance… right now, Michael Jackson is something like two hundred million dollars in debt. Even though he makes about twenty million dollars a year, he somehow manages to blow it all and then some. He has spent an unimaginable amount of time and money on plastic surgery and skin bleaching… and he reportedly just spent around seven hundred grand digitally darkening his skin tone in a recent video.
This situation is all kinds of BEGGING to be picked apart with a fine-toothed critical mind.
It’s also PREGNANT with humor opportunities.

2. Find an interesting-looking group of people and guess what’s going on.
Look around you, and find a couple sitting at a table that looks like they’re on their first date.
Then start making fun of how the guy is acting, how he’s dressed, his posture, or whatever. Talk about how the woman is thinking that he’s a dork and how he’s not getting any, no matter how many compliments he gives her.
Analyzing what’s going on with a close group of others is big fun, and women love it.

3. Make fun of someone famous.
Talk about how a super model is too skinny, or how Ozzy has killed all his brain cells and what a shame it is that he’s on TV broadcasting it to millions of viewers. Make fun of Mariah Carey for gaining weight, being put in the loony bin, and putting out a sucky movie.
All you have to do is read a few gossip magazines to get all kinds of great stuff to make fun of. It’s fun, it’s funny, and it’s a great way to talk like you’re all that.

4. Talk about other people’s love lives.
Talk about the problems that others are going through when it comes to love and romance, then volunteer completely ridiculous theories about what’s going on.
Mention a friend you had who broke up with his girlfriend because she gained weight, then after you’ve told the story, make up a random theory about how women who gain weight are actually lesbians.
But make sure it’s funny, whatever you invent.
…I think you can “feel me”.

The point here is that women are NATURALLY fascinated and drawn to certain topics… so USE THEM. The REAL benefit of talking to women about topics that really interest them is that you can USE ALL THE OTHER IDEAS THAT YOU’RE LEARNING while you’re talking!

You can AMPLIFY THE ATTRACTION as the conversation goes on… as long as you know what else to do as you talk.

Oh, by the way… Topics to avoid:
Rape, kidnapping, stalking, death, chess, computers, comic books, Star Wars, monster trucks, and NSYNC. NEVER talk about topics that might really freak a woman out, or topics that make you look like the biggest loser alive in the beginning. You’ll create BAD VIBES that will make any attraction that you’ve created INSTANTLY disappear. Others to really avoid include talking negatively about yourself, talking about how desperate you are or how long it’s been since you’ve been on a date, asking if she likes you or if you’re her “type”… and any other WUSS-BAG topic that makes you look insecure and needy.

Remember, the key to success with women is creating a powerful emotional ATTRACTION between you and her. If you don’t know how to do this, then NOTHING you do is going to help you very much. If you DO know how and why women feel ATTRACTION for men, then almost ANYTHING you do or talk about can amplify it.

And if you’d like to get the basics of how ATTRACTION works, plus a good set of tools to use for meeting and dating women, then go download my eBook “Double Your Dating”. You can download it here and be reading it in just a few minutes from right now. [This book and the three bonuses that come with it are the FOUNDATION for success with women. Everything you read in these articles will make more sense once you have read the book]